Thursday, 15 April 2021

Sunny's bucket List 2021


I decided to rewrite my bucket list, removing things that are no longer important and adding some new ones. The things I've already accomplished are crossed out.


Go to Eurovision
Visit Disney Florida as an adult
Visit Iceland
See Aurora Borealis
Visit Bar Harbor
See Loreen live
Own a pet hedgehog
Hand feed squirrels
Meet Karl Pilkington
See Ricky Gervais live
Skydive
Shoot a gun
Ride in a hot air balloon
Ride in a helicopter
Learn to drive
Drive on route 66
Learn to spin swords (well)
Have a pet dog
Become a member of Wildlife Aid
Hold a tarantula
Hold a snake
Learn conversational Japanese
Visit Japan
Become fluent in German
Visit Rothenburg ob der Tauber
Successfully trek through Longleat maze
Visit New York
Go to NYCC
Go to SDCC
See inside a volcano
Go on the London eye
Visit Rome
Ride in a Gondola in Venice
Stand at the top of mount Snowdon
Climb Roseberry Topping
See mount Fuji
Overcome my ED
Set foot in all continents
Get to the top of the Eiffel Tower
Explore the Paris catacombs
Ride the gondola in Banff
Visit Chichen Itza
Stay at the Dorchester
Go on a cruise
Bowl a strike
Learn archery
Go skiing
Get a brofist from Pewdiepie
Gain 100 subscribers
Gain 1000 subscribers
Sell something on Etsy
Achieve 100 sales on Etsy
Become a published author
Understand the offside rule
High-5 a pedestrian while driving
Be in a film
Fly first class
Travel first class by train
See RHCP live
Own a telescope
Stargaze (Properly)
Go skinny dipping
Hand feed a duck
Watch a cow sit down
Donate £1000 to a charity (In one go)
Go on a road trip with friends
Own a home
Pierce nipples
Get a tattoo
Dye my hair
Max a WoW character
Max on Runescape
Get to 15 years on Runescape
Visit a nudist beach
Attend a comic con as Kabal
Own a Versace robe
Inspire others to create art (I will never cross this one off. I don't want it to end)


Thursday, 7 January 2021

My Dreams 2020

 In 2018 I logged each dream I had in a note on my phone. I then typed it up into a blog post, and it made for an interesting read. In 2020, I decided to do the same. I started a new medication in the summer, and I was dreaming a lot. Many of my dreams around this time were repetitive and/or triggering, so I won't be including every single one. 


I'm driving, the way I'd normally go was blocked off so I had to take a detour. It was a country lane, but with two lanes for two way traffic. Cars start coming towards me on BOTH sides of the road. I dodge them, panicking. More start coming, as though they're rushing away from something. People crashing into each other, total chaos, floods of people. Then I see why, there's a gigantic tornado heading for us. It's huge, and terrifying. It just keeps coming towards us and I wake just as it's a metre away.

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I was on a date with Chris Pratt for some reason, but I was sure he was still with Anna Faris at this point. We ended up in bed, and then he switched to a completely different person. This freaked me out and I woke up. (I didn't write who he switched to)

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I was out in my car and bought two pizzas. People I don't know kept wanting my help, so they went cold and I couldn't eat them. 

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I went to get a tattoo I've been wanting, but they overdid it. It was wonky, smudgy, black, and over elaborate. (This dream is a little creepy looking back, as it was shortly before my first tattoo. My first tattoo disappeared when it healed, and I had to get it redone. They redid it wonky, and it turned a dark colour ๐Ÿ˜ฒ)

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I was due to sing an Amy Winehouse song at a pub, but a Pokรฉmon song came on instead (one that doesn't exist). I didn't know the words or tune, but I was trying.

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Bad flashback about an ex that I typed "I'm not going to elaborate"

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I was inside a place that looks a lot like Saugus Ironworks from Fallout 4 (The place that houses the Forged raiders). Lots of vats of magma looking stuff. Something didn't feel right and I went outside, only then did the place explode. I was running and running and it was a HUGE end of the world looking explosion. The people that were left alive were screaming that we needed to head north, so that's where I started driving. I stopped in Sheffield to look for somewhere to sleep. People didn't believe me that there was a huge disaster and we needed to head north. Then a train crashed through the camp looking place, and killed most of the people. Horrified, I kept driving north. I don't remember anything after this.

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I was shaving my hair off with a regular razor. I didn't get to see the final result but I was liking it. In what I think was a separate dream on the same day, I was trying to get to a comic con in a place I'd never heard of, but there were train problems. It was all futuristic but it was seriously windy in the station so I couldn't open any leaflets to find where I was going.

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I was supposed to be going to Hell. I was home alone, avoiding being at windows or opening the door because I was due to be taken to Hell. Everything was dark and scary. There was a monster that was sort of like Kirby, except very scary and not remotely cute coming to take me to Hell. Cut to later when I'm there and someone I know is chasing me and it's hot and everything is slimy and made of flesh and blood. I'm trying to climb up a flesh wall to hide. I manage to get up onto a gross platform and lie still trying to hide, and that's the last thing I remember. After this dream, I had a night terror, I woke up and wasn't able to move for at least 10 minutes despite trying to. So strange that I was lying still hiding, then in real life I wasn't able to move. 

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I woke up at 2am after a dream where I was dating someone who wasn't great. I had everything ready at mine for a date, the cooked food was even ready (I can't particularly cook in real life). The date used a group chat for some reason to tell me he decided to get off the bus and go shopping for something that I can't remember, but had nothing to do with me. He said he was "distracted by the lights" and wouldn't be coming. I told him it's a waste of food. The rest of the group chat then started posting photos of where I live, inside my house, where my doctors is, what medication I'm on, so they could all harass me.

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Kanye West was following me. Not online, but walking uncomfortably behind me.

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I was wearing something that people online were ripping the piss out of me for wearing, including one of my exes. The photo looked like a dance practice from the 80's, but apparently it was me. (I was really stressed at the time of this one, because next door were so noisy)

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Nightmare that the person I was dating at the time was flirting with and kissing other people.

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The weeds in my garden got so bad, that they started spreading into my kitchen. Also next door were bothering me lots coming into my house through the back, just being nosy.

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I was at a B&B waiting for a vinegar delivery, but it felt super dangerous for some reason.

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I was working at some kind of carnival. I was inside a sort of ticket machine stall thing. I had a colleague in a similar one a few metres away. He was always stabbing me in the stomach with a knife and I was constantly scared. But it was in the news lately that people were mysteriously dying and I had worked out it was when they had eaten a certain meal given by someone who had something to do with the government, meaning you had been 'marked' to be murdered in some horrible way. I had to work with this colleague in the hopes I could use how nasty and vicious he was as protection. I tried to seduce him so he'd come with me always. There's apparently a big part missing here, next thing I typed I was eating some kind of frog, and I was apparently now marked. I woke up VERY anxious in my chest. 

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I was at Jeffree Star's house and I brought a kettle down to the pool to be filled. He was there so I had a dressing gown on and I was going to dip my legs into the pool for a while. When I tried, it released a swarm of aphids into the air from a nearby plant. There's a big gap here, then Michael Myers and Jason Vorhees were after me. They both found me, but had to fight each other first. For some reason, Myers had Freddy Krueger's glove, and he frisbeed it at Jason, which cut him up. He threw it back and I woke up. (How did he throw it back if he was all cut up?)

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I was at my school in Feltham (Not quite the same), and there was a war about to happen. The other side were across a massive field, and I shouted something like "You don't have to fight. You can go home and actually survive". I was weirdly brave given how scary it was. I then turned and walked back to the school area to prepare. I tried crafting some kind of holster for a knife I had. I then vaguely remember some people trying to hide in arcade prize machines so they didn't have to fight. I don't know if it was the same dream, but I was then at the new flat I'd moved into but I hadn't officially moved in yet. I woke up in a panic, as this would have meant I hadn't moved here yet and not met the person I was dating at the time. (So my brain told me they didn't exist)

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I don't remember most of the beginning, but I was in an empty warehouse, I was going to be killed for entertainment. At the end though, I met someone that wanted to sue Nintendo for their Animal Crossing Octopi characters' bellies, not matching that of the real life species.

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I killed someone (that I don't know), and was constantly on the run. Always moving on trying to act like I wasn't suspicious. Constant dread and fear.

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Only a nap, but I kept buying Spider-Man figures and they were sending repeats. He was standing in a gun holding pose, and I knew it wasn't right. A person I believe was (the person I was dating at the time) was arguing with me about the material, saying it was made of 'yanny'. I was certain it wasn't. 

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I was inside Fortnite with the person I was dating at the time of the dream. We landed at the house on the lake planning on having private couple time. We were interrupted each time we tried. Then someone arrived with a gun and I didn't have a weapon. I picked up a pen and was unsuccessfully trying to stab them while my partner found somewhere to hide. 

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I was in a warehouse sort of maze and it was like Saw. I only really remember running from something, then seeing 50 Cent lying on a table. The back of his head then exploded.

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I was watching someone clean a massive shop sign. They unhooked the sign and took it down to clean. I was surprised they didn't jet wash it. (I was googling window cleaners the previous day)

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(This was a time I started a new medication, so I was having a lot of repetitive unpleasant dreams. I've not included everything)
I saw a post where my most recent ex had already moved on. Said he's spending time at a motel with a young girl. She had really short green hair. I was somewhere being taken care of  by actresses like Meryl Streep. Barbra Streisand was taking plaits out of my hair. 

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I had a strange dream I was trying to escape some kind of school. It was weird. I don't really remember anything.

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A pop up came on a computer asking me to buy psychic readings. I didn't get rid of it properly and got a virus. Panic and skip to when it had ruined my life and I was backstage on a chat show. Instead of chatting though, it was like a Battle Royale. Fighting, blood, death. It ended when a friend I know from cosplay suggested how to escape.

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I was still with an ex. Cheating and arguing dream. I then started working at a brothel, where lots of famous people went. I didn't get with anyone, but I had deep conversations with Keanu Reeves and he was a really lovely gentleman.

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I was in a school building waiting for something. There was a big pile of chocolate stacked up. I picked up a tray of creme eggs. David Tenant was leaning against a wall, I offered him one and he went for the biggest one. I asked "Do you really need another big one?" He looked impressed (wtf?). Another dream a few hours later, I was in a different flat living high up. There was a crazy lady bothering everyone as we were all trying to get in. She kept breaking things accidentally.

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I went to an ex's house seemingly for a hookup. Instead, I ended up bonding with his mum and having a nap.

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A neighbour called Cara put Jaffa Cakes outside my door with a happy birthday note (It wasn't my birthday.)

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Friends with Jeffree Star dream. We went to the pool and beach.

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"Had a dream but don't remember it" I typed. ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

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I was in a new place trying to study art. Argument with someone caused them to come and take my bed away. I had nothing to sleep in and was probably going to get kicked out of art.

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Lots of scattered dreams that I mostly can't remember. I was with someone I knew in the dream but not real life. We were in a laundrette, and they freaked out to hear I put milk in before cereal (I do). I spent most of the dreams in a massive creepy hotel.

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"Forgot dream" I'm dying laughing at typing this sort of thing ๐Ÿ˜‚

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All I remember is being in someone's house that was so filthy and wrecked, you had to climb over stuff to get anywhere.

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An ex got a job in adult entertainment while we were together and I was heartbroken. I waited for him after work, but instead of coming to talk to me he told me which pills to take. (I didn't type which, one can only assume it was dangerous ones)

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I was at Jeffree Star's house again, someone very young went on a killing spree. The police didn't take me seriously. There was footage of this child butchering some people yet they didn't believe me.

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I was in a new flat, which was a new build, but it wasn't very homey. It was very office like. A lot of the walls were glass, and the floor was those really cheap carpet tiles. I was trying to film my new little fireplace and stereo, but the fire kept going out as soon as I pressed record.

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I was going to get my anchor tattoo and another two people did it wrong. It was wonky and red ink. (In reality this is the one tattoo I have that doesn't have imperfections)

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I had a caesarean but no baby. They cut me weirdly, it was to the left and right of my womb, vertically all the way down and around the lady parts. Later in the dream, I was making pies from Haribo.

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Dreamception. I was dreaming trying to work out whether I had dated Lewis Capaldi in a dream or real life (Neither).

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I don't remember much but there was a big comic con outside, I was struggling to park and drive around the roads.

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I was trying to get drugs in the form of Smarties. Whenever I got them, they were just normal Smarties and did nothing.

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I was in the game Dead By Daylight, which is strange as I haven't played it this year. I was running from that increased heartbeat noise. I came to an indoor metal gate like a jail cell where the bars were lined with cakes similar to the posh food in the movie The Platform. I tried to climb over it to get something and there was another murderer there as I woke up.

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I wasn't going to write this one because I woke up so angry but I'm gonna (I actually typed that in the note on my phone). I was on holiday somewhere with an ex. He was being so messy and wasteful in the hotel room. He was using 3 slow cookers to cook chips all day, and only had 3 chips in each machine. For some reason I was responsible for the electric bill. When we needed to check out, he tried to take the car. We hadn't packed but he was trying to drive away the Range Rover we hired. He was basically kidnapping me. I was screaming that we're not leaving our belongings. I was trying to find the handbrake to stop him taking the car when I woke up.

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I watched Pirates of the Caribbean in my dream. Wtf.

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I went to visit very old childhood friends to transfer some sort of phone data and outstayed my welcome. When I got back, someone put up my Christmas tree. But this was bad, it wasn't Christmas and I wasn't putting it up as I needed lights. On Instagram someone was pretending to be me in my Misty cosplay. There was a professional shoot and someone was tagged that wasn't me, talking about it.

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Markiplier showed a room of people including me, a video of people with explosive diarrhoea. I then had to desperately rush to the toilet myself (I didn't wake up needing to). 

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Someone I know gave me thousands and thousands of E tablets. There were 4 colours and most were orange. It was a gigantic bag. I woke up before taking any.

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I was on a date in some kind of scary above ground submarine thing, but I think it was post apocalypse. Opening a door to people that are like the scorched in Fallout 76. One above ground room was a shower, and it looked like the front garden of the house I grew up in. All overgrown and dangerous.

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I was at Jeffree Star's flat in NYC. It was tiny and he lived with someone else. Even though it was central New York, it looked like Nevada deserts outside.

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I got a pet cat, but it wasn't trained and I had a hard time doing anything in a different room to it. Later in the dream, I had a bird. The bird was trained and kept giving me kisses. Randomly at some point I got an email from Billie Joe of Green Day, saying he wanted to get in touch with me but I didn't have a phone.

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I went on a date with Henry Cavill in some rough looking high street. I don't know if it was the apocalypse. He was being really nice to me and I was surprised he was into me. We went back to my flat so I could change into something more date-worthy, and he was helping me choose when I woke up (๐Ÿ˜’)

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I only remember tiny bits of this. I was at someone's house (I didn't know them). There was a bloke who was a bit chavvy, but for some reason I was into him. He showed me something on his phone and an app notification popped up, something about rating women's boobies. He was really embarrassed and I was a bit grossed out. It's an app where real women post naked photos of themselves to be roasted. I don't remember much more other than there was a dog in the house and it was quite dark.

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I was supposed to marry Henry Cavill (Wow that was quick ๐Ÿ˜‚) and some lady neither of us knew. She ended up dying. I don't know how but I was devastated.

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I had a break up with someone (doesn't exist in real life). I was alone and felt all the feels. For some reason, I went to find my dad, when I got to the run down house he had half a dozen women inside. He wouldn't help me. And I had to play some weird board game to escape. The first room was a board game, and every time I tried to step forward one of the women pushed me back to the beginning. (This one was the saddest to type up)

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Apocalypse dream, mostly scavenging. It was a bit like looting in Fortnite. I think Rhett and Link were there too. (I was playing RDR2 in real life, which involves a lot of picking up items)

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I was in the original Red Dead Redemption. That ending scene. I was there in the barn. Instead of walking outside, I was frantically digging a hole in the mud with my fingernails as quick as I could. I got in, and used a straw to breathe. I woke up just as they entered.

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I was trying to find a recipe for the perfect Yum Yums. I was told they were with a lady, but the lady is stuck inside a wall. I could even smell the perfect yum yums. I was trying to figure out a way to tear open the wall, when I was rudely awaken by my groceries being delivered early. So I never got to taste them!


Ok some of those were really weird this year. I particularly belly laughed at the Kanye one.
Did you enjoy those? Read my 2018 dream log too. Let me know on Instagram what you think!

Monday, 28 December 2020

Strawberry Dress Review

Early 2020, the now internet famous strawberry dress by designer Lirika Matoshi was noticed worldwide, when model Tess Holliday stepped onto the red carpet wearing it. 

It's made of a net fabric called tulle, which is a mixture of other plant materials, combined to make a scratchy rough material. The dress is a dusty pink and is midi length.

I bought this dress in Sept 2020, and paid $510.50 (~£378.52). Their website didn't state how long it would take for international orders, just that it takes around 10 business days to ship the item. It's handmade, which is why it takes a while to ship. 

Five weeks passed, and I still hadn't received a shipping notification. I was sure I'd seen somewhere online that due to the flood of orders, they were taking longer than the normal 10 days. I was a little worried as I was getting fat on new medication, concerned I wouldn't fit in it by the time it arrived. 

The dress arrived on the 9th Nov, I wasn't impressed that the front of the package not only said the exact contents "Strawberry midi dress", but had an L for large. Cheers, the postie and any potential doorstep pirates know my size and that I've spent a ridiculous amount of money on something. I was luckily at home, and got to my doormat before anyone could pinch it.

"Strawberry midi dress"

When I opened the package, I was immediately disappointed. I had the feeling in my stomach similar to being a child and getting a present that's really not you, but you have to awkwardly smile and say thank you. I had to put a face on, I'd spent basically my rent on one item of clothing. 

I tried on the dress wearing one of my 'indoor' bras, and one of the first things I noticed was how unpleasant the material wasBecause the dress plunges quite deep, you don't really want to be wearing a bra. Tricky for me, being at the time a 32G. 

I was then mildly horrified to look at my hands. They were covered in glitter. I look at the floor leading to the room I opened the package, and I'd left a trail through my apartment. A spokesperson for Lirika Matoshi said "we overpack our details with glitter so that the shedding during transit does not affect the aesthetic value of the dress." However, when I inspected the dress, some strawberries had patches of glitter missing.

Patchy strawberries

High quality is often associated with sewing on detail rather than glueing it on, so it's a little strange that these weren't hand sewn sequins instead.


The more I looked, the more I hated it. It was scratchy, it felt cheap, it was uncomfortable to wear because there's no layer between your boobies and the scratchy tulle. I had a fresh nop piercing at the time, so I didn't want this against my skin. It'd be a bit easier for smaller chested people with gravity defying baubles, as you wouldn't need to wear a bra and can protect nips with plasters. Your boobies would chafe like f***, but it'd be possible if you have a preference for Instagram photos over comfort. I wonder if the roughness of the material would erase the tattoo I have on my inner arm, like a cheese grater.

That scratchy noise! ๐Ÿคฎ

But wait, you run into another problem. It's flipping see through. So you can't go braless if you plan to wear it around most humans.

See-through material

Because of the shape of the dress, the waist doesn't quite sit at the waist. It's higher, so if you have a hourglass figure it transforms you into a plank shape. If you're apple shaped, it'd look a bit weird. 


The sensible thing now, is to ask to return it. I sent an email on the 9th Nov, the day I received it, letting them know of all the issues and attaching 7 photos. The automatic reply stated it'd take them 2 working days to reply. A week goes by and nothing. I figure they may be short staffed due to the you-know-what of 2020, and just forgot to amend their automatic email reply. So I gave them another week. And another FOUR. Mon 21st Dec I forwarded my original email with the photos and I got a reply later that day from a member of staff I'll call "Mia".

Mia apologised, saying "I am not sure why your email from 11/9 went unnoticed" and I wondered whether she was winding me up, knowing I'm from the UK and the date was 9/11.








Mia went on to explain about tulle, and I couldn't help but feel that describing the process as "what makes our items so unique and special" the equivalent of a chef saying what makes his dish special is swishing it around in a toilet bowl before serving it. It's not special, it's rubbish. 


I couldn't help but compare the fabric to the material on my window, which is a harsh net designed to keep bugs out ๐Ÿ˜ฌ
Mia was replying to my returns queries quickly, one of my questions came after she attached the returns slip in an email, and I asked in slight disbelief whether the seller pays for returns when it's due to faulty/poor quality. She stated company policy requires the buyer to pay for return shipping. The returns slip also says the return must be sent back within 10 days of the buyer receiving the item.

Erm, it took 6 weeks to even get a response. (The website states for international returns, you must email first). You also must send your returns using a tracked service.

Sorry what? Tracked?

I used the Royal Mail calculator to work out how much it would cost me to return the item, and with their demand of a tracked service, the absolute CHEAPEST it'd cost me is £62.65. It doesn't say on the package how much it cost them to ship it to me, but $20.50 of the $510.50 on my email receipt says shipping... (I'm unsure as to whether they sent it tracked, as no packages are signed for at the moment here in the UK because of 'you know what', all my packages including this one are left on my
doorstep)

I queried about this, I found it strange when the item can't be resold that the buyer would be responsible for the return shipping. This is normally when you just change your mind, or it doesn't fit. Mia replied swiftly "from the images shown the dress seems to be standard and there are not defects. Please note this is just how the item is made."

That right there is the moment that prompted me to type this blog. This wasn't a sub par quality mistake riddled dress, this was normal.

I feel like I need to try and say something nice about this dress. There are only two things I can think of. It's got a decent weight to it, when I read about the tulle being lightweight it concerned me that it'd be flowy. It's not a flowy dress. Though it does have that horrible scratchy noise from the video above, when you walk in it. The second is Mia responding quickly and politely to my emails, answering all my questions (Including when I asked to confirm that my photos did come through on the original email, as seeing them should have warranted a "Holy ball bags that's terrible, definitely not the quality we are supposed to craft the dresses at. I'm going to personally ask if the seamstress needs a day off, and remind them they need to line the boobie compartments"). One also can't help but remember the 6 weeks my issue was ignored.

I knew it was unlikely I'd be wearing this dress out to Tesco or round the high streets of north east England, I thought I'd be prancing around my living room feeling like a princess. But I don't want to do that, as I'd be obsessively whipping the hoover out each time I twitch or burp and some glitter falls off.

Overall, it's an absolute shambles. I own Versace items, so I know what expensive is supposed to feel like. This is simply a ripoff. Cheap material, rough, unfinished, messy, and aesthetically overrated. I'm unsure if I'll return it, because it makes me upset to imagine them selling it on to someone else. It's currently just sitting in the back of the wardrobe at the moment (I had to buy one of those dress bags, so I don't get glitter on everything).

Don't waste your money. You would feel much happier donating those hundreds to an animal shelter or domestic abuse charity, than you would getting Instagram likes.

Edit 7th Jan - I received a letter from DHL demanding I pay a customs charge. £139. I paid 500 quid for a dress that's worse quality than £10 dresses on Shein. Later that day, I returned the dress. Postage cost was £58.15. I'll update the post when I get a refund.

Edit 19th Jan, I got a refund today after the package was signed for on the 16th. It wasn't a full refund ($490), so with the currency exchange I'm down a total of approx £73 quid. I still don't have a reply to my email to DHL regarding the customs charge.